Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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