There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
