Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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