I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize