last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
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MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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