We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
