dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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