I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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