Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
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