ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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