Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
