thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize