Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Randomize
Follow @tfln