i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
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You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
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i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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