I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
