What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I'm going to jail i love you
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
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Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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