You're a womanizer and a bitch.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
