I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
