Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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