If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
