I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Threesome in a minivan. New low
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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