hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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