do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
