i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
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