Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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