New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
