My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
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I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
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is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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