just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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