I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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