It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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