the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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