the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
