why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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