new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
