Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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