How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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