so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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