too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
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I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
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I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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