Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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