would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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