I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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