It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
