On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
