I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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