New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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