did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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