sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Randomize
