Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize