We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
