I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
